Shame, and some Random Ramblings

Why is it that we feel so ashamed as survivors of SA and/or CSA...as adults, as survivors, we know, in our minds, that it wasn't our fault,so why do we feel so much shame because of it? Maybe because we are used to it, because of the secrecy, because for so long it was ingrained in our beliefs (at least in the case of CSA, and sometimes SA) that we caused it.

I have been trying lately to lay down the shame. It feels really strong the past couple weeks, being that I'm living back home with my parents. Being around my dad is...ugh...sleeping there is difficult. It's been really a rough few weeks. But I think that it will get easier. I just have to save some money so I can get out on my own, and take things one day at a time, stop blaming myself...

My ex and I have decided that we may try working things out. I am not sure I'm optimistic about how that will go...we'll see. My daughter is doing good, we have been enjoying the warmer weather...I am trying to take things slower and enjoy one day at a time.