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Monday, June 14, 2010

Thought This Quote Was...Right

Saw this quote today on Pandy's (which is an online forum for survivors of sexual abuse and assault) and I thought it was fitting:


"You'll hold onto this forever. Guilt gives you the illusion of control in an uncontrollable situation. The 'if I had done this or that' creates an escape. It stops this being unanswerable. A random event. Except, it's already happened, and the truth is there is nothing you can do. And you're going to have to work out some way of living with that for the rest of your life. Whatever happens. Or it will destroy you."

Maybe that is why we blame ourselves - even when we know in our minds that it wasn't actually our fault, even though we would never blame another survivor for her own experience - because somehow it allows us to keep from admitting that we were not in control. No matter why we do it, it IS going to destroy us if we don't find a way to make ourselves believe that it was not our fault.


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