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Monday, July 12, 2010

Writing Exercise: The Effects of the CSA...

...on my self-worth:
  • I am worthless, or close to it
  • I twist my self-worth to depend on the people I care about, so the smallest, most unintentional slight is taken with too much sensitivity
  • I don't deserve to be cared for
  • I am dirty, and bad
  • I am at fault

...on my relationships:

  • I trust people I shouldn't too quickly, and people I should, not enough
  • I am emotionally needy, seeking constant reassurance that someone cares
  • At the same time, I push people away, testing their caring
  • Relationships with my parents are superficial
  • Relationships with my sisters...were strained; now, they are better, but I am still unsure about how they really feel toward me

...on my views about sex:

  • Sex is easily used for power
  • Sex is easily made to be about control
  • Sex is painful and causes guilt
  • Sex is a way to make people want and/or need you, to make them want to be close to you

...on my life in positive ways- what strengths have I gained?

  • For all my emotional neediness, I am pretty self-sufficient- I know how to run a household and take care of a family
  • I am compassionate and empathetic
  • I am not broken, even with all I have been through- this shows me that I am strong
  • I know how not to parent

Writing Exercise from: Bass, E. and Davis, L. (2008). The Courage to Heal: A Guide for Women Survivors of CSA. (4th Ed.). New York: Harper.

1 comment:

  1. yea, well done for tackling this exercise, and for being honest and open. What you write is really inspiring, though I know how difficult it is to allow ourselves to be this honest sometimes

    ReplyDelete

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